Disclaimer: This article is meant only for software engineers working in core development. People from other professions might not find any humor in it. Reading this blog for them would only mean throwing away the next 10 minutes of your life.Great !! since you are reading it anyways, either you are software engineer or a person who has all the time in the world.
Here’s how a typical day would turn out for a software engineering team. The subtle difference being that unlike the usual applications development teams, this team works for a gaming company. They develop products for the ever-expanding game market.
We have our all-important Development Manager Veedol (name changed to protect identity) and his hard working team members. Reggie, Sunny and an outsourced developer from another team Kris (All these names also have been changed to protect their identities) .
The morning starts off with a team meeting. The manager shares the goals ahead. The team is fresh and attentive, they listen with rapt attention.. Given that the core development is completed, what is pending now is the Unit Testing. So the Manager announces “Its time we all got serious and start playing games.” Sunny and Kris have to play all the games from start upto level 5. Reggie being a senior member in the team has to play from Level 6 upto the grand finale of the game.
Being one of the most hardworking teams on the planet, our team does their dedicated work playing games all morning. However its 10:15 am and Kris has not turned up yet. Veedol is furious and confronts him as soon as he enters. Where the hell have you been? Reggie and Sunny have been playing games all morning and look at you? Kris soon settles down and grabs his game pad.
An hour and half passes by and its time for the next meeting which includes a status update. Kris has a grievance here. Unlike Reggie and Sunny he has to come to the office to start his games. However Reggie and Sunny have been given Playstation2’s which are portable and can be carried home in a laptop bag. However as per corporate policy only some people can get a Playstation2 others have to make do with the all bulky xBox360 consoles in office. Another disadvantage was that, those who have Playstation2’s can choose the ‘Play from home’ on some days. However most managers do not prefer giving this option to their team mates, because you are never sure if the guy is Playing games all day sitting at home or just whiling his time away reading some documentation on the web.
Reggie has found a bug in the game. At level 7 when Batman swings with Batgirl, Evil Vadmin succeeds in surrounding Batman with the help of his Men in Black pants. Batman is not able to escape in spite of shooting back. However Sunny analyzes it and determines that the bug is in the gun which was supplied by the ATG team. So he suggests they transfer the bug to ATG. Veedol reviews the test plans and decides that level 9 can be tested only by himself, this is because level 9 has partial nudity which might not be suitable for Kris or Sunny.
The product is then released, and the team celebrates with a release party. However the joy of the release is short lived as the market results do not meet the estimated sales targets. The higher up’s in the company attribute this to poor functional design. So they get one more chance to revamp the game in Release 2.
Headcount is approved to hire 3 Product Managers who would lay down the roadmap for the game. Areas that need to improve are fight strategy and Car chases. To give it a blend of a ancient Rome there will be a section where the hero enters the era of CIV BC, which involves some Arena fights with animals.
The HR department of the company schedules a walk-in interview for the posts of the functional experts. After series of rounds two people are short listed for the post of "Functional Lead - Fight Sequences". A quick look at them and the HR head realizes that it was a good decision taken by the company not to enforce any dress code. The candidate finally selected has over 10+ years domain experience in the field. He started off as a roadside thug and then graduated into inter-gang fights, Has 2 on-site experiences serving prison terms outside the country. In a nutshell our candidate is a perfect fit to sketch out all the fight sequences for the game.
For the next post ‘Functional Lead – Automobile Chases’ There are 3 candidates short-listed. The first is a retired Formula – 1 driver. Comes in with a lot of experience. To name a few he knows every turn and cub on the Melbourne, Indianapolis, Monaco, Montreal tracks like the back of his hand.
The second has an equally impressive profile. He was a highway patrol cop in LA for 4 years, then joined the New York Fire department and served as a Fire Truck driver for another 3 years. This man can handle pressure and still make it through peak traffic. The choice is tough for the interview panel.
However one look at the third profile, and there is no doubt on anyone’s mind as to who gets the job. Our third contender has floored all the selectors. In addition to having immense driving skills he is a hard worker and works 2 shifts. He started off as an auto driver in Bangalore, After putting in an impressive 5 years on the auto track he now takes on two shifts in a day. Early mornings and late evenings he drives a z series Tata Indica Citi Cab. During the day he drives a BTS bus. This allows him to unwind and relax from the pressures of driving the City Cab, since driving a BTS does not require much concentration or monitoring as to where you are heading on the road.
Ps: our esteemed friend does not drive a BTS Volvo (Volvo’s are for wimps), Real drivers drive the BTS manual stick shift, which has the individuality of the driver, etched on its chassis. The Original mould that was put by Ashok Leyland has long lost its identity. Over time the driver has dented and re-dented the chassis reflecting his flamboyance and carving out an identity of his own.
It’s been a good day for the recruiting team, 2 positions filled in and one more to go. The third Product Manager position is for ‘Function Lead – Animal Combats’. This is for a new section in the game, which will introduce a roman arena fight sequence. Unfortunately there were no walk-in candidates for this position given the unique nature of the skill set.
However since the company had tie-ups with leading consulting agencies in the city, An agency has scheduled a telephonic interview at 4pm with a candidate. At 4, the call starts. Our candidate makes it clear that he is currently offering consulting services for a high profile project and can only devote 15 minutes for the interview. A few questions asked and our candidate is selected. He is a senior dog catcher at the Bengalooru Mhanagara Palike (BMP) department.
The HR and PFO head whisper something among themselves and all nod in agreement. Our 3 Product Managers are taken and introduced to the Group 4 Security, So they know that these 3 are indeed employed by the company and should be let in.
A bright start to a new series of gaming.. Let the Games Begin.
